"Don’t be fooled by the calendar. There are only as many days in the year as you make use of. One man gets only a week’s value out of a year while another man gets a full year’s value out of a week."
- Charles Richards
"The key is in not spending time, but in investing it."
- Stephen R. Covey
"This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do with it."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Model, Laura
This one isn't so new, but its another one of those gems of wisdom that somehow still elude us.
Use your time wisely.
Simple, I know, but its mostly the most simplest of things that tend to bite us in the ass when we don't take care. In the Army, we called it "Paying attention to the little things". What exactly does using your time wisely mean and how do you do it? Well, I'll tell ya. I don't really know. Its different from person to person and you have to be the one to chose what you do.
During my periods of downtime, I try to pick up on my To-Do List and shave it down a little. This happened this weekend when plans didn't come to fruition. Truthfully, on Saturday, I had to miss a shoot due to weather. That bummed me out. I got some take-out and watched a movie. The next day plans again fell through, but instead of moping around, I shook it off and did some tutorials, studied some Business Financial Management chapters in a book I'm reading, and finished up my online Traffic School course from a speeding ticket I got a few months back. So the first day's use of time...POOR. Second day's use of time...WISE. I was flexible on the second day and took a bad situation and make something profitable out of it. I got KNOWLEDGE. You'll never make a better investment than what you can by investing into yourself.
Laura, From back in 2008
So who's unemployed right now? Who's laid-off at the moment? If you've got time on your hands for an indefinite period of time or just for the day, make some positive use of it. Exercise. Write the next chapter in your book. Call up a friend that you haven't talked to in a while. Send me some money through my Paypal Donation Button. Who care's what you do...just do something that results in a positive.
We used to have something called Hip-Pocket Training when I was serving. I hope you are being safe this Memorial Day, by the way. Hip-Pocket Training was a concept designed to take advantage of unexpected downtime for soldiers. NCO's, (the Sergeants) would have on-hand a special training planned for just such occasions, i.e., after a long road march to a destination, we arrive but our rides back home have not. The first thing we'd do was to ensure our coordinates were correct and then we'd radio in a situation report. The response is that the truck due at our rendezvous has an engine problem and a replacement can't be allocated for my mission for two hours. Now you've got mad soldiers on your hands who are cold, hungry, and tired. They don't want excuses. They want food and a hot shower. A good NCO will occupy their time with some easy training on Land Navigation techniques or risk mutiny. I used to do this same thing with my kids on long car rides. They'd get tired of sitting in the back seat for so long, so I'd quiz them on Bible history. Next thing they know, they're pulling into Grandma's driveway.
The only difference now is that YOU have to take responsibility for YOUR OWN Hip-Pocket Training. Learn a new language, computer program, or beneficial skill. Get out of your comfort zone, if you can. Stretch yourself a little by leaving your same old routines alone for a while. And while I'm at it, in addition to using your time wisely, pick your friends more wisely. Prioritize your family more wisely. Make your decisions more wisely. Spend your money more wisely. And take care for what you eat with more wisdom. Utilize your time to make a better YOU. Think about all the times you've complained that you don't have time to lose weight...read that book...or visit relatives in retirement homes. Now you've got the time. What are you going to do with it?
Here's an idea for you. Its fairly novel, easy, and actually common sense. However, despite the wisdom in it, very few people actually take advantage of the benefits this simple little action can afford to you. Let me tell you how simplistic it is. Despite the fact that I am writing a blog post on the matter, I TOO am guilty of not exploiting this ever so easy concept when possible. What is it, you ask? Well, as you've probably already guess from the title and Iacocca quote:
"WRITE IT DOWN!"
Yeah. Simple, ain't it. You would really be surprised at what you can achieve when you have an idea and write it down. Spell it out on paper, or on your computer as it were. Where ever you do your best thinking, (okay, except for the shower), take a pen and paper with you and challenge yourself to plan out your goals in a way that makes the most sense. After you've built your road map to success, STICK TO IT! Ever decision you make you should be able to stand up to your own personal constitution. In an almost flow chart sort of way, if the decision to do (or not do) something takes you away from you objective, strike it from you to-do list. How many of us really have time to waste with non-productive errands, tasks, or actions that have no bearing on our goals. I know I don't, even though I'm still learning this lesson, myself.
Writing things down has helped me get pointed in the more decisive direction and has made me organize my efforts into deliberate actions with less waste and more efficiency. Who's up for a cup of "decisive directions and deliberate actions"? YOU should be. You should readily wake up every morning and take a smell the aromatic flavor of efficiency and take a sip while its still piping hot. Specifically, putting it on paper expanded my scope and helped me see possibilities that I otherwise didn't account for and resulted in a plan that, with the proper execution, has the possibilities to be both profitable and fulfilling.
I say its simple, but if I said it was easy, let me take that back. Its not easy and it should't be. Any worthwhile endeavor will more likely than not be a challenge, but I dare say its worth it and that's all that matters. Doing whatever it takes should be foremost in our minds as well leave behind those that can't shake off the scales of mediocrity and complacency. Not everyone will climb aboard even though they want to, but there is a big difference between wanting to do better and doing something to make themselves better. As you rise up and climb the achievement ladder, they will remain at the bottom and watch you ascend. Either of a few things will result. Chances are, they will try to throw negative ropes around your ankles to bring you back down to their level. They don't want to be left behind. If you get caught up in that, then you'll provide them company...which misery loves, by the way. If you do not succumb, and continue to climb, you'll leave them behind. You'll likely end up with a new friend circle which is okay. Love the naysayers where they are, but don't sit with them or keep too much company there. You'll give them something to talk about and increase their worth a little when they can say they knew you back when. In a way, you will become their claim to fame.
I know you're loving these pics of Model, Tawny right? Be sure to check out her Model Mayhem profile. Yeah, she's a hottie...granted. The girl's got curves that should come with Warning and Danger signs.That much is obvious. There are a bunch of pretty faces and hot bods out there already. Tawny definitely brings lots of flair and energy to a shoot and sometimes its those intangibles that make all the difference. If you're needing a model in Las Vegas, don't hesitate to give this young lady a look. She's been beneficial for my portfolio already and I know she can bring that added something to your photography projects.
*** BTW, I'll putting together another Ball of Light session this Saturday, the 28th of May and could use a curvaceous nude model or two. Need to be available around 6pm for a few hours to shoot some sunset pics and my ball of light imagery. Get with me for more details.
"I believe the ability to think is blessed. If you can think about a situation, you can deal with it. The big struggle is to keep your head clear enough to think."
- Richard Pryor
Model, Faerie... from a recent family session
Faerie, from our original shoot in '08
Can you think of any time in human history where social classes did not exist? How about in any culture? I haven't done my research on this, so know that I am purely speculating here, but I believe that since the dawn of time, man has been at a minimum, classified as either rich, poor, or somewhere along that spectrum. I did fairly well in Economics, with the exception of Managerial Econ in grad school, where I got the only C of my MBA. In my defense, that class ...sorry, I digress. I learned enough in the several Economics classes I took to know that in America, the majority of us fall into the mid-range area, or middle class. It's probably like that in most of the developed democratic countries. On a global scale however, the majority of humans fall to the left of the spectrum on the poor side. These folk look at our poor in the U.S. like we look at Warren Buffett. To them WE are plenty rich! If for no other reason than the fact that we have clean water available to us on demand. Few and I mean VERY few are in the rich category. However, if you concentrate for a second on the rich end, you'll find some interesting facts.
I'm getting off my point, I think. I was about to list all these sources of income distribution and inequality, but all that does is spur debate over socialism and a distaste for the wealthy and that's not where I want to go. So let me keep this simple by getting directly to my point. My point is that when you really think about it, if you live in a free society, you have reason and just cause to be happy about your opportunities to aspire to BE more and DO more, by KNOWING more. Yes...there will always be rich and poor. HOWEVER, there is no better time in the history of mankind for you to decide which end of that spectrum you want to be on! You're not following...?
Okay, look at it this way. Yes...about 1% of the rich control more than 40% of the world's wealth. But tell me where else in man's history has he (or she) been able to affect his status in society than right now in this country or anywhere in the free world for that matter? If you lived in the 13th century and you were an average citizen, not of royal blood, how many opportunities did you have to affect your status in life? About 2 and that required you to advance in the service of the military or become the world's greatest salesman. All the way up until the 20th Century, most everyone lived the life of the worker ant or bee. You were born to labor until you died for the service of the queen bee.
But look at today. Yes, the economic conditions of life are deplorable right now. But when you look at the bridge between the rich and poor, there are two things you notice about it. ONE, its wider than ever before. Check your Census data on that. But more importantly, TWO, it's a two-way street now! More than ever, more poor people are becoming wealthy by their own accord. Visa versa, the rich do not have a life-time membership into Club Exclusivity. How many have you heard about that have lost their wealth via Wall Street, banking, or mortgage failures. Or worse, Bernie Madoff victims?
Google and Facebook are less than a decade old and stemmed from an original idea, yet they are two powerhouses in business today. Microsoft is not the forerunner they used to be. I often send my kids news reports of mere children who create an idea and net millions in revenue in just a few years. When have you ever heard of such a thing for a child who wasn't in the entertainment business? Technology has leveled out the board a little in this game of life. It takes an idea and the wisdom to cultivate that idea. Both of which require a brain. And you know what...everybody reading this blog right now has a brain and chances are you live in a free democratic society. If you reside in America or Western Europe especially, then why can we not have a change in attitude and perspective on life? We get people that immigrate here from other countries who are willing to sell all, risk all, and do all that it takes to get within our shores for a chance at a better life. The value a U.S. citizenship more than anything but family. I wonder what it is that they see in the opportunities in our country that we do not. Change your mind and way of thinking, people. Let's move beyond this monetary conundrum that we find ourselves in. If you want the economy to change, start with yourself. Whether good times or bad, you should still prosper. Make it happen. Do it with me.
"You see?...See? See what a man can do? Never mind you can't tell one letter from another, never mind you born a slave, never mind you lose your name, never mind your daddy dead, never mind nothing. Here... this here is what a man can do if he puts his mind to it and his back in it. Stop sniveling. Stop picking around the edges of this world. Take advantage, and if you can't take advantage, take disadvantage. We live here. On this planet, this nation, in this country right here. Nobody starving in my home; nobody crying crying in my home, and if I got a home, you got one too! Grab it! Grab this land! Take it, hold it, my brothers, make it, my brothers, shake it, squeeze it, turn it, twist it, beat it, kick it, kiss it, whip it, stomp it, dig it, plow it, seed it, reap it, rent it, buy it, sell it, own it, build it, multiply it, and pass it on -- can you hear me? Pass it on!"
---Reverend Cooper talking to Milkman and some friends in Toni Morrison's book,"Song of Solomon"
I love this first video by Rob Dyrdek "You've Got to Make Your Own Luck". (Even though I don't believe in luck, the concept is sound.)
“Man can live about forty days without food, about three days without water, about eight minutes without air, but only for one second without hope” - Unknown
Model, VikiMae
I know I've got my challenges in these hard times. There are some moments that quite literally to depress my spirits as if quicksand were involved. Then there are times where all I can do is laugh at disparity. Those are those moments where just when you feel like it CAN'T get any worse, it starts to rain. I laugh at those moments maybe because I know they'll make a good story one day. I can recount several Army days like that, but I've known too many as a civilian as well. I feel like I can weather these storms well enough though. Sometimes you need your little tricks that help maintain sanity. Shooting nudes is one of those for me, but also hiking. I got to be on the radio just recently for NPR's State of the Re:Union recently talking about just that. We did a segment back in December where radio producer, Tina Antolini came down to hike with my Las Vegas Hiking and Outdoors Meet-up.com group to get our story which just aired over the past weekend. The episode details different aspects about Vegas, and the hiking bit comes up around minute 43 and lasts about 6 or 7 minutes. They interviewed our group leader, Alan Gegax and myself for this segment of the episode. I've got to send them a note to get them to post the pics I took of us hiking that day on their website.
I do think its possible to become overwhelmed with the suffering of others around us at times. Maybe not, overwhelmed. That might suggest its reached unbearable limits, but it can be heartbreaking for sure. Me? I think I'm built like a rock. I didn't come up soft. I got my ass kicked as a kid, until I learned to turn the table and bring that notion to a halt. I'm sure it played over into my choices in the military to take on some of the hardest challenges and training I could get. I never got to so SERE school, but I tried... HARD... and some people wonder why I would ever want to willfully subject myself to that kind of training. As a young adult, I became a father right out of the gate and had to grow up fast. I never had time to feel sorry for myself at any point in my life. Hardships have tempered in a sense to allow me to hunker down in the storms and survive the best way I can.
But it has become more than evident that many people are not so tempered by the fire. There are those around me who suffer and my heart goes out to them. These economic challenges have gripped the masses unlike anything we've known in some time. I listen to or read about people talk of giving up, surrendering life, blaming God, the President, the economy, their bosses, etc. for all their woes in life. Like someone with no hope, they fall on their butts and wail like children blaming the world. One thing I like to study is the evolution of time over the life of the planet. You learn of animals and different species that die out primarily because they did not adapt to the change in their environments. Climates change as the Earth's elliptical orbit around the sun changes over thousands or millions of years. Plate tectonics move continental land masses all over the place. At some point in time, the area of Mt. Everest was underwater and now its the roof of the world. The Sahara wasn't always a desert. There are major forces at work that shape the planet over eons of time. On a macro scale, time is invisibly slow with geological change. Yet still, change occurs on a micro-level of time, as in within our spans of life. Everybody has heard how change is inevitable, but I don't really think people really consider the meaning behind that. Humans have brains that make us more adaptable than any species to ever live on the planet, but we've become accustomed to our ways and don't understand the factors that bring about change. Adapt and Overcome!
Fighting with the gnats...or whatever they were.
"Change is inevitable. Except from a vending machine."
-Robert Gallagher
Times change. Its the only constant in life. You will experience ups and downs and just like after any storm, the sun will shine on you again. Learn to laugh. Be like a rock. Find your coping fixes that allow you to keep your sanity. I have my faith in God. I trust He will bring me through or bring me home. In the meantime, I do what I know I can and am supposed to do and let Him take care of the rest. Keep improving. Stay alive and keep on believing you can win. You never know when that moment of rescue will arrive. Dory said it best..."Just keep swimming!".
Many thanks to new model, VikiMae for being so quick to model for me over the last couple of weeks. We didn't do any nudes, but sometimes you just gotta shoot and she was more than willing to be shot. We did three sessions that resulted in some fine work. I got to get my fix for the time being. Sooner or later, her Model Mayhem profile page will get approved and I'll update this page with her new links, so you can see more of our work together as well as with other talented photographers. [10 minutes later...] Actually, here she is on my website: VikiMae. Enjoy.
"When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell... LEAP."
It was a good day. Well, a good night I should say. Not long ago I posted a video about Denis Smith and his Ball of Light documentary done by Sam Collins. My main intent behind the post was just to illustrate how you can still find something new in photography and become successful within this business by finding your niche. I should watch that 15 minute documentary every morning when I wake up just for the inspiration. I posted the link for the video and talked about it on the message boards of one of my photo groups. They decided to schedule an event based on the idea to go out and play with some light painting techniques. Well, the ball of light intrigued me most and you know me... I'll put a nude in anything. Every things better with a nude model in it.
But the idea didn't really hit me until I was talking with my friend VikiMae, (who you'll see pretty soon). Actually we were texting, I think and the thought came to mind the day before the event. I don't know if you have ever tried to secure a nude model for a shoot with one day's notice for a Saturday night, but Model, Bayne came to my rescue. She was on time and a real trooper because it got cold out in the desert. I'm talking chilly and the wind was a-whistlin'. This was PURELY experimental. I had never done anything like the ball of light concept before and it had been a couple of years since I had worked using Bulb exposures. To my demise, I had not recalled that I'd need a cable release for bulb exposures. Fortunately, my buddy JB came to my rescue or I'd have been doing a totally different experiment.
Bayne and her escort were perfect. Both were very helpful in not only posing and assisting, but also advising in my concept. Both have prior experience in photography. Bayne became even more endearing as we shared our love for film photography and the darkroom processes. It was cool to be able to talk that language to a model. Her patience and help was all to instrumental in making this experiment a success. Incidentally, she's probably the first nude model I've worked with that I didn't really see nude. I mean... I saw her but only in incremental flash bursts. These are shot in the dead of night and I'd pop her with split second bursts of light to momentarily expose her, no pun intended.
I'll definitely be working to perfect the technique. Its a little tricky to make as perfect of a sphere as I can with my ball of light and still expose the model without either one being overpowered. These timed exposures are fun and I think the fundamentals of my technique are sound. I just have to fine tune it and balance the ball and the model in perfect exposure. I'll keep working on it. Hope to get to work with Bayne again soon. If you've got an interesting project, you'd do well to consider her. The woman is the total summation of the elements of professionalism. I'm telling you...Hire her.
What I've learned.... There are things you can control and there are things outside your span of control. In the midst of times like these when your backs against the wall, you've still got a choice. One option is to just surrender and let this whole mess take its course. Whenever you land when the storm is finally over, you can begin anew if you wish to do so. Or, you can ride this thing out while doing what IS in your control to affect. The resulting effect is that you are that much more ahead of the game when the tide turns. One thing you can always affect is YOU. When times are tough, you can still make a commitment to improve yourself. No matter what's going on around you, you can still make a choice to actively pursue development of yourself, whether that is physically, professionally, spiritually, or academically. When things in your world are spinning, you can always choose to keep your edge sharp in the meantime.
For me, that means studying my trade even more. Take in more online tutorials, re-read the manuals to your gear, staying abreast of the current trends, and looking for more avenues of differentiation. It also means getting back to working out. Sitting on your butt editing photos all the time and only moving when you get hungry can take a toll on the body. I'm down about 15 pounds for the year so far which is definitely a good thing. Another 15 and I'll be where I want to be. I can already feel a big difference in my body and its definitely a good thing to take the added pressure off my knee. I think its also important to spend some time improving yourself by helping others. Volunteer! I think I've mentioned before about my work with the Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep Foundation. We do free portraiture and photo sessions for mothers who give birth to stillborn babies or children who aren't expected to live long. Its a hard gig, granted. I did a session a few weeks ago that made me almost break down. I don't suppose that's anything I'll ever get used to, but I'm making a point to do more with them as calls for our services come in. Something like that may not be for you, but you can still take time to help teach others in your field who are up and coming. I've been a part of several photo organizations and try to do my part to assist my peers in becoming better.
I've always been a proponent for multiple streams of income. Most people hear about that with dealings of multi-level marketing businesses. Those are great alternatives, but if they're not for you, then I still think its important to have that mindset. Write a book or a screen play. Hey, you never know! Start working on a secondary business that has nothing to do with your main business. It can be complimentary to your main money-maker, but its better to not have the same tie-ins. When you main line of revenue begins a seasonal downturn, your secondary generator usually takes the same hit if its tied to the main. Something that ain't connected will still allow sustainability while your main rebounds. Slow downs in your business are excellent times to work on personal projects and develop those alternatives into viable options and bring them to fruition. I knew a teacher once who earned a decent living and drove an old car, but lived in a really nice paid-for house. What most people didn't realize was his side gig of about 10 rental houses that he successfully ran. He saved his money from teaching, bought his first rental property and then used the proceeds to purchase more. If he lost his teaching job, the man would still do very well.
I think its important to spell out your plans. Write them down. I've been told that for years and have done so in the past. For whatever reason, I had done that in a while and didn't follow my own rules. An opportunity forced me to put everything on paper and a lot of the mystery mist began to clear. I've written several business plans for other companies and individuals. I've consulted and reviewed other people's plans. When it came to my own, for some reason, I just kept it in my head and got all the more frustrated when things simply weren't coming together. It wasn't until I started writing everything out, just as if I were doing one for another person that my scope expanded and possibilities began to develop and present themselves. The dream became a goal-oriented vision, as opposed to remaining as a fragmented ghost-like apparition that I could hardly remember details about.
So many people around me are being affected by this economy. I say now's the time to rebound and I hope you'll do it with me. I'm far from perfect, but I do know better. Do the right things. Stay the course. Make every day count as a step towards the goal. Every action and choice should bring you closer to improving your game. Ultimately, it shouldn't matter what the economy is doing. Our success should not be dependent on external factors. I say we move forward, take the hits as they come and deal with the setbacks by continuing to manage the things we can control...ourselves. Learn from not only your mistakes but others as well. Fall, get back up. Do the right thing again. Don't succumb to depression or become weary of setbacks. Keep moving. Make it happen. We can do it.
These are photos from my first ever session with Trixie from about 3 years ago. Trix has her own business, Just 4 Trix, LLC, teaching Pole Dancing in her studio located here in Las Vegas. I got to do some work with her recently and got to see her students and clients learn the routines. Some of these women do it just for the workout and believe me, Trix will make you work up a sweat. I saw women of all sizes and shapes, but there was one guy who was blowing them all away! I hadn't seen a guy with that sort of skill or agility except for in Cirque du Soleil shows. If you've ever been interested in giving this a try, now's the time. I keep running into women that say they've always wanted to do this. Well, no more excuses. When you meet Trix, you'll understand what I mean when I say she's an exceptional woman. She knows her trade, she has the skill to demonstrate, and she's a natural born teacher. Check her out.
"I wish more people felt that photography was an adventure the same as life itself and felt that their individual feelings were worth expressing. To me, that makes photography more exciting."
- Harry Callahan
"Bamboo", Terrell Neasley
"Saddle in Panguitch", Terrell Neasley
I follow several blogs. Some are friends that I keep tabs with and others are professional resources from which I glean information. One in particular has made encouraging impacts with a few blog posts which you can find at Chase Jarvis's Blog. The first one of note was simply timely, entitled "Everything is Going to Be Alright". I was really in need of slowing down and de-stressing when I got the email version of his blog in my In Box. I laughed out loud when I saw it. (Saying I LOL just didn't sound right.) Needless to say, several commentators shared my sentiments as your scrolled down the comment list. His next blog post was also timely, but more of a good truism or principle to live by. "The Only Things That Really Matter Are..." was posted just a few days later and once again, after reading it, I LOL'ed...(or is it L'ed OL?) He recounts the most important things that relate to who you can become and what you can do. Its really an excellent short read.
NHRA '09 Hotrod, Terrell Neasley
I'm just finishing up on two projects that deal with my health and my profession. Its too complicated to go into details, but suffice to say, it has consumed my attention, efforts, time, money, and energy over the last six months. Paperwork...lots of paperwork, research, editing, etc. Now, I've got it pretty much all done and it seems like I'm in a sort of state of mind that begs the question, "Okay, so now what?" Well, in addition to working my profession, I want to start getting back to doing personal projects and making goals again. Specifically, I need to get shooting more nudes, but also I want to start doing alternative and film photography with specialty cameras. I got a Holga Pinhole camera six months ago and I have YET to put this thing through its paces. Part of that is because I want to do some nudes with it, but I have to also find some color medium format film for the thing and probably lots of it. Then its off to experimenting with a patient model. The latest issue of Rangefinder Magazine has some interesting ideas related to Scott Highton's Virtual Reality photography that I'd like to explore. Just got the mag in yesterday and I'm anxious to finish pouring through it. Lots of good stuff.
"Tower of Power", by Terrell Neasley, from a recent hike
"End of a Beetle", by Terrell Neasley
from a recent hike
I've also met a few inspirational people along the way here recently. Model, Selena Bree from a recent interview is one. I've got personal reasons to travel around over the next 3 to 4 months, but Selena Bree is another model I've got to get to Arkansas to work with. She's full of life with an attitude that makes you want to be around her. Very charming woman. Samantha came by to see me a few weeks ago. I've lauded her several times on this blog, as a search for her reveals. And then there's a conversation with a fellow photographer and friend who got to talking to me about hiking the Appalachian Trail. Her dream is to do the Pacific Crest Trail someday. Me...I want to do the trifecta. The AT is 2200 miles from Georgia to Maine. The PCT is 2600 miles from Mexico to Canada, and then there's the Continental Divide that runs 3100 miles which starts in Mexico and runs up New Mexico, Colorado, Wyoming, touches Idaho, then Montana, and on into Canada. Talking to her was inspirational in that it got me to refocusing on being able to make that happen. In the process, I began war-gaming a way to shoot models throughout each of the hike. It'd take some serious coordinations and even more intestinal fortitude, but I'd like to do each of these trail systems over a 3 year period. I'll probably need some sponsorship or maybe some kind of funding from grants or friends. This talk coincided with a new doctor that I've been seeing that suggests he might be able to fix my knee. With a stronger knee, the first thing I thought about was the fact that my dream of doing these trails might not be dead after all.
Enjoy these shots of some of my Fine Art stuff. Some are older images that I've revisited. Others are of course, new.
I guess this post goes along with the previous one about going solo. Just a few days after I made that post, I came across another blog post written by Scott Bourne on his GoingPro2010 blog. This particular post is about taking risks. Above all the things I can think about that differentiates one person from another in their prospective fields as it pertains to being successful, taking risks is the top element that separates the men from the boys. Or the girls from women, as it were. By nature, I think most people are risk-averse. In business and investments, we are actually taught to minimize risk, but we also understand that greater returns are expected commensurate to the level of risk assumed.
To some degree, we all take risks every time we step out the front door. We are comfortable getting into our cars every day and driving aggressively in morning traffic while texting and putting on make-up, yet this is where people have a tendency to die most often. I believe I can say with a high degree of certainty that this is one reason why most of us will not make grand achievements, fulfill dreams, or become wealthy. At some point in life, I think we all have that moment analogous to standing at the edge of the high dive and waver on the decision to jump or not. On the ground, it doesn't look that high. You see other people dive off and splash into the water. You can count the 1.5 seconds it takes for your buddy's feet to leave the diving board and hit the water. But when it's your turn to climb up the ladder, walk out to the edge, the perspective somehow looks different and that thrill that rushed through your veins from watching your friends do it has now consolidated into a heavy ball of a rock in the pit of your stomach.
We will approach this theoretical high dive moment several times in our lives as we encounter one situation after another. I remember the first time I had a leadership role in the Army. I was given an order to recon an intersection that was roughly 5 or 6 clicks away, [A click is a thousand meters, btw]. My map reading and land navigation skills were actually impeccable way early in my career. It was one of the first skills I learned to master behind marksmanship. The problem was two fold. One, I was still a Private First Class with an expectation to lead two other Privates on a far off mission. The weight of leadership can be quite daunting. The second was that this was in the dead of pitch black, moonless night. I literally could not see the hand in front of my face, yet I was expected to confidently make my way to this intersection and sit there to watch it. Night observation goggles were useless on this patrol. There was no star-light to help amplify vision as most of this movement was under tree canopies.
What made me strong was the fact that I had two other people depending on me. The whole thing would have been disastrous had they looked in my eyes and saw fear. While I was truly fearful, I walked forward into the night with my two Privates in tow. I took the lead the entire way. I planned my route on a map before hand and had it approved by my supervisor. That was if we did get lost, somebody would know a general area to look for us. I also double-checked my pace-count before we left, which is often shorter when you walk in limited visibility. I trusted my training and my compass. Said a prayer and walked forward.
I don't recall how long it took us, but we made it on target and ahead of schedule. We got a little more light towards the end which made it possible to observe the road intersection with our night vision goggles. My superiors didn't believe we had made it so quickly when I radioed back on our position. We had to break protocol and low-crawl down closer to the intersection to read off the mile-marker and road signs to verify that we were indeed where we were supposed to be. We did our mission, reported back, and returned to be debriefed. At the end, I had my company commander ask how we got there so fast in the dead of night. He admitted that he was thoroughly pissed when he was told that it was myself and two other privates who had been given this task and not more skilled veterans. If not for the fact that we had already been gone a half hour, he'd never have allowed it. The man even jokingly asked how much we paid for the cab fair.
My point is this. Sometimes we have to simply jump, but it's still a good exercise in wisdom to jump as prepared as you can. I walked off into the night confident in my training, equipment, and God! I wasn't some trainee who couldn't find North on a map. Many times its the same thing with pros. You stand on the edge of Going Solo, with all the training and knowledge you'll ever need, yet you choose to climb back down the ladder complaining that the water's too cold. THE WATER WILL ALWAYS BE TOO COLD! Get past the fear. Embrace the thrill. JUMP!! Enjoy the fun and have some great stories to bore your kids with.
Photography is a business that has seen many derivatives...many variations. One might assume that other ventures might prove more worthwhile creative endeavors. Everything that can be done in photography has already been done. The market is saturated. There is no money to be made. How can one stand to make a living as a "photographer"?
I've had to battle with naysayers such as this for my, umm... resolve, concerning entrepreneurial interests in this field where many chose to run out of it in a state of panic. The market's flooded. Digital has put a camera in the hands of anybody willing to call themselves a photog. GWCs (Guys With Cameras) have tainted the business and undervalued our work so as to prohibit us "decent" togs an honest wage.
I must admit. Some of these doubter-opinions have sprung from my own head. Its not an easy thing to tackle the unknown in lieu of the security of that all-mighty, ever-dependable paycheck. However, I have ever been the risk-taker and if I ever trust in anyone, then it is myself, sometimes albeit to a fault. I believe myself to be my own best investment. I have my own best interest at heart better than anybody outside of my own mother.
Two things, I believe are key to being successful in this enterprise of image making. One is simply learning to be good general businessmen and women. The other is finding your niche that makes you special. Yes, many believe its all been said and done. I do not subscribe to that notion and I am making this blog post because I came across two videos that very handily explain my two points better than my words can.
The first deals with a man at his ropes end. He works at a dead-end job that he hates. He picks up nasty vices that almost compel his wife to leave him. Then he picks up a camera. Takes a journey. Finds that he is much like everyone else in the business and choses to search further to distinguish himself and he succeeds. Check out Denis Smith, from Austrailia with his art work making Ball of Light.
Next, I beg you to get more comfortable in your seat and spend another 7 minutes viewing the video by graphic designer, Brandt Botes, of Studio Botes. Brandt recently chose to go solo and begin his own business. He sought out the advice of friends who each gave him nuggets of wisdom that he could build on. Check out his stop animation presentation that details what he found.
A few weeks ago, I attended a writer's conference that specifically dealt with memoir writing. At that conference, I met a great many authors who had a story to tell. None of them, however was as unique or so profound as the lady who sat next to me on the front row. Samara is an Egyptian born woman, who grew up in the ancient city of Cairo. That in and of itself is a unique story. She could have probably had a best-seller talking about life as an Arabic woman who came to the U.S. What makes Samara's story so unique is her choice to focus solely on her sexual liberation by discussing the dichotomy of her life as it relates to Sex in Egypt and Sex in America. I can assure you that you will not agree ALL of her life philosophies, but you will find it an interesting read, nonetheless. My mouth was agape for much of the time I spent reading it. Get her book, "When the Veil Drops", from Amazon and enter the world of a woman with ideas that will leave some wanting more and others thinking new possibilities.
1. Hello Samara. Let's start by introducing yourself. Tell me a little bit about your background and what brought you to America.
I am 37 years old single woman and free lance writer. I was born in Egypt. I was a virgin at the age of 23. I came to the US after I married an American soldier. It was lust mistaken to be a love story since I had no experiences.
2. Did you come from a wealthy family in Cairo? Would you say you had a comfortable life there?
I came from an upper class family in Egypt and I had a very comfortable life if by materialistic comfort.
3. I don't want to deviate too much into political affairs, but would you say your family in Cairo is happy that Hosni Mubarak is no longer in power?
My family members hold different opinions about Mubarak leaving power, but mostly they are cautious and awaiting the replacement to formulate an opinion.
4. So what is this book about and what prompted you to write it?
“When the veil drops” is my sexual memoir. I have always kept a journal. I was asked by a close female friend to put it in print.
5. Of all the cultural differences between the United States and Egypt that you could talk about, why do you choose to write about sex? I mean, why not a woman's right to better education, equal pay, or representation in politics?
I actually believe that the right to sexual freedom is the one women’s right that is one of the most neglected and ignored.
6. You open your first chapter, "Sharmoota", meaning whore, detailing how a doctor basically took you as you were being seen for an actual medical condition. Even though you do give in and ended up seeing him several times thereafter, don't you have to admit that's not a very professional thing for a doctor to do and doesn't that verge on sexual assault?
I understand that it can be viewed as sexual assault. It was not for me. It was an act of craziness in the heat of the moment. The doctor asserted himself as a man and I loved it. For me he initiated, I had the right to not give in. He did not force me.
7. Pick the chapter in your book that has the most meaning for you. Give me the chapter title and then summarize for me the details of it.
It is hard to choose a chapter that has the most meaning. I believe the sum of my experience made me who I am. Each relationship was meaningful to me.
8. Okay then, which chapter was the hardest for you to write about? And tell me what made it difficult to recount that particular incident.
Jack M.D was the hardest to write. It is the longest relationship which lasted longer than my marriage. I was trapped in it for over six years. Writing about it help setting me free.
9. At the end of your book, you recite poetry in Arabic and then give the English translation. Would you mind talking about the last poem, I believed entitled, "The Straight Rod"?
My poems are my very personal expression free of any form and rules. It is me and how I feel.
"The Straight Rod
I seek protection from my doomed devil
From a merciful God
I don't want my sins to be forgiven
I know my words disgust you
Yes, I wear the veil
My face has repented
My body resists, refuses
and likes torture
I seek protection of my doomed devil
From a merciful God
I don't want my sins to be forgiven
I walk on a straight path to hell
and I don't feel alive
Unless I am on a straight rod"
- Samara
10. I have to admit, some of your philosophies, opinions, and concepts on sexual relationships are probably the most incendiary I have ever heard. I spent the majority of the time reading with my mouth agape. Mainly because I would have never expected to hear all this coming from a woman of Arabic descent. Do you write more for the shock value or is every word a legitimate sentiment from the heart? How did your feelings begin to develop into this new line of thought?
Every word I wrote represents how I feel and think. The shock is a byproduct of my opinion and not intended goal. I was called a Human resources nightmare before. I would not call it a new line of thought. I grew believing in polygamy. Now I extended the male right to multiple partner because society does not allow polygamy. Writing about your life help you discover yourself and your line of continuity. 11. Explain why you believe that a man who doesn't cheat when afforded the opportunity is not a man worth keeping.
I believe that a man has to be honest first to himself. Honest means true to his nature. You can’t be faithful to others while betraying yourself and denying your true nature. I believe that men can have sex without emotional attachments. Women can’t. If a woman cheats then she does not love her partner and a man should walk away. If a man has another sexual partner then go back to his wife or girlfriend that strengthens their emotional bond.
If a man does not cheat because he does not want to hurt his partner, he is under a woman’s control.
If a man does not cheat because he thinks that he cannot enjoy other women then he is a lost cause already.
The only exception is the military or politician if a man does not cheat fearing to lose his job. I can understand and respect that because keeping his career is at least a male reason. For example, my partner was a soldier who deployed. Of course, I asked him to have safe sex with locals. I also asked him to call me and I got to hear him. It was very arousing to me and I enjoyed it. It felt like I got to join. It is more flattering to me to know that I have a man who is desired by others and can please others.
12. There is a dedication in this book to your Mother, whom you acknowledge isn't thrilled about your lifestyle. You mention that she fasts and prays on your behalf. Are you still friends with your mother? Has any other friendships/relationships been altered now that this book is out? I am very close to my mother. She found a way to accept me and love me even if she disapproves of me. I have lost few friends over my book. They acted all puritan and refused to stay my friends. I knew their sexual stories and the number of their partners which was way more than my humble list. Yet, I became the whore to them.
13. There are some commentary in your book that is not to flattering to people of Islamic faith. In fact, some of your points go against Muslims in general. What makes you so willing to be outspoken on these matters? Do you have any fear of reprisal?
I am a moderate Muslims. Some Muslims may disapprove of me but Islam teachings ask us not to judge each other and leave judgment for God. I have always been outspoken. I have to be true to myself first and my true nature. I believe Muslims who will be mad at my writings have bigger issues to worry about than my book. There are few mosques who asked American Muslim to ban the book and not to buy it. So far, they won and the book did not sell. If the book sells it might prompt them to take other measures against myself or the book.
14. Who is this book for? Who, do you believe, will best benefit from your book?
Initially, I wrote my book ," When the veil drops" for women, however it had more male than females readers. The purpose was to entertain and give a light hearted reading to women who could be my girlfriends.
15. Do you think young women coming of age should read this book and learn about or experience what you have found out about sex? Will you try to educate young Arabic women about sex as you see it...maybe in seminars, workshops, or a school?
If given the chance, I am willing to talk about my book and discuss with women in seminars and workshop maybe not in schools.
16. What's next for you? Will there be a part two?
I am working on writing a book about my childhood in Egypt. I am also working on a second edition of "when the veil drops" coming in June.
