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15 February 2020

A Whole Year Since Jenny. Can You Believe It?

“The ‘Muse’ is not an artistic mystery, but a mathematical equation. The gift are those ideas you think of as you drift to sleep. The giver is that one you think of when you first awake.”

― Roman Payne

Doesn't seem like a year, but I guess that's the nature of TIME. It creeps steadily along and before your know it, you're saying "Happy New Year" again, marking the transition of another lap around the sun. Well, it was a year ago already that my good friend, Jenny came to work with me in Peru for three weeks having never met me before.

We had some hard travel days, freezing nights living on a lake, and still came up with a gorgeous 230-page photo book with some of the most amazing images and locations I've ever been to. I am most grateful for her trust and willingness to let me play, experiment, and try new things all while being patient during the challenges. Sometimes things don't work the way you think they will. Sometimes problems come up that you don't anticipate or lights don't work when they should. Jenny's muse instincts kicked in and helped find alternatives and sometimes she was just being understanding. We cut our losses and moved on to a different gig.

That's what a muse does. When you look at my shots, you won't see where her stomach might have been upset, because she is still smiling and still giving. You won't know that she had a personal tragedy at home to contend with. I continued to shoot even after she got the news. You won't even know that she stayed even after finding out her husband was in physical pain. He handled it, but you gotta know her mind was with him. That's call commitment. That's what a muse does! She prioritized me and my art over her own comfort. My job is to do all I can to balance all that because I don't want her to be uncomfortable, of course. And that's where the mutual collaboration comes in. I became "Johnny on the Spot" making sure she had water, rest, and I tried not to push too hard. Yet through it all, we got it done.

Art Model, Jenny, After some bad news...
Near Tumbes, Northern Peru ©2019 Terrell Neasley

I am also most grateful, as well to her man, who is also an accomplished photographer! She visited so soon after her birthday AND Valentine's Day last year. I hope he enjoyed the book we produced. It took an additional printing to get it done right. I was not satisfied by the initial publishing and got them to redo it. That's a rare thing for my relationship with this company. In fact, I think I've done two reprints for quality control in more than 50 large scale books I've done with them.

Not long after the shoot, somebody asked me what was the best location and then also asked what basically amounted to, what was my missed opportunity. If I were to add my own question, I might add, what additional accessory I might have wished I had with me. My best location is a toss-up between the beach near Tumbes, in Northern Peru and Colca Canyon down further South. I got great shots in both, but if I had to pick... maybe the ones in Colca are my fave. As for missed opportunities... hands down, that's Lake Titicaca.

We lived on that lake for 3 days, but there was no outside place to do nudes on that tiny man-made island. Everything was visible to everyone. At night, it was uncomfortably cold, below freezing. The residents were up early morning. The one thing I didn't think to do was simply ask. There were kids around, but I don't know... maybe had I asked, provisions could have been made. Our host, Albert, might have taken us to another remote island that was in the process of being built, but not settled yet. Shoot... Just doing nudes on his straw boat would have been cool. I didn't think to ask. The conservative nature is strong throughout Peru and much of Latin America. But like I said... who knows. I should have asked.

For an additional accessory, I'm going to go with a Graduated Neutral Density Filter. Shooting Colca Canyon with one would have been perfect, but there were so many other gorgeous landscape shots that could have benefited from having a GND. I did recently pick up one, but I'll get into that a little later on in another blog post. I was able to make due with what I had, however. GND or not, I had my camera, lenses, and good light that I was able to employ creatively. Once however, this was not the case. We tried. It didn't work. We moved on.

If you're a photographer doing nudes, you should hope you run into a model like Jenny. I learned. I was inspired, and I got opportunities to problem-solve which makes me a better photographer. I would not have had those opportunities had she just come for a week. But THREE WEEKS? You're bound to run into something that's going to blow up in your face and make you think... hard! All challenges are not fraught with evil or ill-intent. Sometimes they are just exercises that make your photographic muscles grow. So, you better learn to think differently out here. There's no jumping in the car and running to the nearest B&C Camera store for gear or accessories. But if you've got a Jenny, you can still create masterpieces, no matter what!

05 October 2020

1000 Days of Adventure and Stories

"Still around the corner, there may wait a new road or a secret gate."

~ John Ronald Reuel Tolkien

This past month, I hit a benchmark that I wasn't even aware of until I was downloading some files from my online backup. It told me that my desktop computer (in storage in Las Vegas) had been out sync from continuous backup for 1004 days, which is the time I unplugged it, packed it, and locked it up on December 21st, 2017. It has been that long since I've had a home where I have all my stuff and lay my head down every night. Since then, it's been hotels, hostels, and apartment rentals... the longest stay in one place being close to 6 months in Xela, Guatemala.

I know some people thought I'd be back after only a few months. Two and a half years later, I'm still rollin' and no where near finished. Delayed! Halted! Holed up! But not finished. A global pandemic and the current reduced status of the US passport has me unable to move around as freely as I might desire. The Global Passport and Power Index has the US ranked tied for 23rd, but there are 53 countries ahead of us. Bosnia/Herzegovina, Serbia, Croatia, and even Ukraine are ahead of us. Japan and New Zealand tie for the strongest passport in the world for 2020.

Less countries are admitting US citizens and even here in Vietnam, people still ask me when I got here before they let their guard down with me. I have to make sure they know I was here PRE-Pandemic! This should be obvious, because the borders have been closed and no new tourist visas have been granted since March. But given the recent smuggling incident where some Chinese immigrants snuck in some illegal Chinese citizens and then coincidentally we got a second wave... I guess I can understand.

So how did all this start for me? Well, I've already told you about people who have been influential in my life regarding international travel... The Army showed me new lands and new people. An ex-girlfriend showed me it's not as expensive as I thought to go someplace. My friend Heather convinced me to go with her to Central America and that started me to traveling the way I do now. But there have also been a number of other factors while I was growing up that also heavily influenced my wanderlust.

I think I've always been an explorer by nature. Where I grew up in Texas, there are woods behind my house. I used to venture into those woods with my little brother, Greg just to see where they led and what was within them. We didn't have Google Maps back then. I was always interested in what was around the corner, over the bend, and beyond the horizon.

I also read books. Who doesn't remember "Where the Wild Things Are"? It's a story about adventure! And I read countless adventure books like this. None was more influential to me than J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Hobbit" and Bilbo's adventure with Gandalf and the Dwarfs. I actually saw the 1977 animated version in the 4th grade during an assembly. All of my 4th grade class saw it. I was mesmerized the whole time.

It was only later on, while I was in high school that I accidentally came across The Lord of the Rings series. Discovering, after all this time, that there was a continuation! Crazy!

“It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.” - J.R.R. Tolkien "The Lord of the Rings, Fellowship of the Ring"
Art Model, Jenny Copyright 2019 Terrell Neasley
I think that one quote stuck with me best. Along with, "Not all those who wander are lost..." which is part of a poem in The Fellowship of the Ring. Then a year AFTER high school, I learn that there is yet another continuation... or rather a preceding book to the series called, "The Silmarillion". I listened to that one on audio CD's when I found it at a bookstore. I had to have it! I actually first looked at the box and thought, "They are just copying LOTRs!
But all throughout my childhood and adult life, I've had stories of adventure surround me or I was on them myself in the Army. How could I keep still? I had to seek out the horizon. Initially, that was moving out west into the unknown deserts surrounding Las Vegas. That sufficed for a while. But adventure called again and I headed off to Central America 3 or 4 times. Sometimes solo... sometimes with company.
Art Model, Jenny Copyright 2019 Terrell Neasley
But there was one nagging feeling that gnawed at a spot in the back of my brain since the first time I met someone on my first trip to Guatemala. They had been traveling for a 13 months by the time I met them. I thought I was big-timing it being gone 6 weeks. It pestered me! What is that like to be traveling for years at a time? That was back in 2012. It took me until 2019 to actually find out after crossing my first year of travel. Three more months and I'll be on year THREE! And I feel like I'm just getting started.
Art Model, Jenny Copyright 2019 Terrell Neasley

Thanks again, Jenny for coming out to meet me in Peru, despite NEVER having met before! That was a FABULOUS THREE WEEKS! Good times, tough times... we made it through blistering heat on the beach and freezing cold nights on the lake. Those are the things that makes the story.

16 February 2022

Jenny in Peru: New Photo Book Coming Soon

Indeed... a new Jenny book is coming out soon. I'll get to more on that in a second. However, "Jenny in Peru" is already available! TWO HUNDRED THIRTY PAGES in a large 14 x 11-inch hardback book, using high quality long-lasting archival paper. This is definitely an art book suited for the coffee table or living room center-piece.

JENNY IN PERU

By Terrell Neasley

The book illustrates three weeks of adventure in which I detailed much of this in the recent blog post, "Travel Nudes, Jenny in Peru". Do yourselves a favor and go back to visit that post one more time. I think I've got about 10 images from our trip to accompany that post, which is the most I think I've done on any blog post. You can read about the details of our travels from Lima to Northern Peru, back to Lima, then to two locations in Southern Peru, and finally back to Lima again.

Now, about the NEW book...

Jenny in Peru will be the start of a series of art photobooks that I will re-create that will be a tad bit more "economical". It will be a value art book, less pages, paperback, HOWEVER... the book profits above cost will go exclusively to the model being showcased.

Are we on the back end of this pandemic? I don't know the answer to that question. But after two years, we can all agree that it's been tough on a lot of people. I try to come up with numerous ideas to help and have done what I could over these last few years. The most recent idea has been restructuring these photo books to bring you the images and the story, but hey... maybe not with the top of the line, archival quality paper stock. Maybe not exclusively with full page spreads. Do I really need it to be 11x14 or will a smaller size do? Can I get the price down to half... a quarter... even less? Well, we'll see. I'm working on that.

So stay tuned and keep a look out when I announce my latest Projects for the Models where I restructure some of my current photo books to a smaller more economical size. 100% of everything over cost will go to those models.

See you soon.

You can visit MY BLURB to see all my currently available photo books.

02 June 2019

Photo Book - Jenny in Peru

I estimated about 2 months and that's right about how long it took. Two months after Jenny Anne Rose left me in Peru to go back home, I have completed all the edits and now the book "Jenny in Peru" is now available! TWO HUNDRED THIRTY PAGES in a large 14 x 11-inch hardback book, using high quality long-lasting archival paper. This is definitely an art book suited for the coffee table or living room center-piece.

The book illustrates three weeks of adventure in which I detailed much of this in the recent blog post, "Travel Nudes, Jenny in Peru". Do yourselves a favor and go back to visit that post one more time. I think I've got about 10 images from our trip to accompany that post, which is the most I think I've done on any blog post. You can read about the details of our travels from Lima to Northern Peru, back to Lima, then to two locations in Southern Peru, and finally back to Lima again.

What was unique to me on this particular entire photo project was the greater focus I put on the book while I was shooting. Normally, I shoot simply for the shots, themselves. At most, I shoot with the edit in mind. That's how I've always worked. The edit has always been my primary objective for each individual shot. Almost every single one is made to stand on it's own, sometimes possibly in a series...maybe a triptych.

This time, I followed my normal methodologies, but I also incorporated shots that were specifically for the book orientation, such as shooting in landscape orientation and also some with the intent to make it cover double pages (I want to do the next one in Portrait Orientation) When making a book, the story is the priority. So I want a clear flow for the narrative that gives the viewer a reason to pause and study each page, but also an incentive to leave that page and see what comes after. I want to entice my viewers to travel all the way to the last page. And after having evoked an emotional response one way or the other, they wonder what else I will deliver soon.

No matter how well-structured and creative a story is, Presentation is second on the priority list. Second, but a very CLOSE second. From the beginning, I wanted the story to be, in a way, narrated by the model with not only her moves but also her words. Given that she is an astute writer, I was able to use her talents and incorporate her style in a way that gave a more complete story about our journey from her perspective as well as insight into her thoughts. In this way, the viewers are able to appreciate the artistic use of her body in unfamiliar environments as well as peer into her mind and witness within as well as without. My hope was a better sense of character development and a deeper appreciation for this model's performance.

Part of presentation is organization and structure. I organized this book mostly chronologically, but also categorically. I used the model's perspectives to introduce each different segment of our journey. Font, font size, alignment, book title, and book customization all go into essentials in book making. This is an art book, so I chose Premium heavy-weight paper. I wanted to incorporate my same since of quality in my prints into this book which also comes at premium expense. I have used the publishing services of Blurb.com for several years and they have provided me with great results.

Order your copy now to enjoy this most excellent exhibition of adventure, travel, and art. Thank you for your patronage!

20 July 2021

Use Artificial Light to Help You Regain the Passion

Art Model, Jenny Anne Rose ©2019 Terrell Neasley
Window light coming in from the front

“Wherever there is light, one can photograph.”

~ Alfred Stieglitz

Of course, daylight from the sun is a type of natural light. Same as light coming from the moon, stars, a candle, fireplace, or fireflies. Ambient light is the opposite of flash and is a constant light that stays on continuously for a time. It might also be referred to as Available Light. Artificial ambient light can be the incandescent bulbs that light your house or the light that automatically comes on to illuminate your the interior of your fridge when you open it. The natural light photogs can get a little something out of this. Anyone can take a photo in the daylight when all the settings are done in either Full Auto or "P"-mode. Just let the camera do all the work and you're good to go. However, to bring back that passion, try this: work with ambient light in the darker settings and use any available light that you can come up with. I've used light from a cell phone held close to a model's face. I've used the moon on a 8 second exposure.

But here are a few things you're gonna need in order to get busy with this concept. In the last post, I set you up with flash and triggers for under $200. In this case, I'm gonna stay in that same neighborhood. I'll begin with a good tripod. I've worked with several new and aspiring photogs who make a dubious mistake in my opinion. And when I say, "in my opinion", it's just that. I'm not quoting law and regulations. It's my perspective that when I see someone spend a grand or more on a good camera and then shop for a $25 tripod, I'm just gonna say no. When I worked at B&C Camera, usually the cheapest I get them out of the door with is a $160 Promaster system that will take care of their support and stabilization needs. You simply don't trust a thousand dollars on twenty dollar legs. Just don't do it.

Art Model, Jenny Anne Rose ©2019 Terrell Neasley
Strip of light coming through window light from the front

I use Promaster tripods myself! I travel the world with a smaller, lightweight carbon fiber system that handles all my needs. Its strong and more compact to travel with. Back home in the U.S., I use a bigger, but medium sized Manfrotto 190CXPRO4 Tripod with Ball Head Q2 carbon fiber unit that is the most beautiful system out there. Aesthetics usually don't count, but I fell in love with this thing a few years back and it's gorgeous as well as strong. Good sturdy legs are key. Next is having a ball head that can support the weight of your camera when it's tilted vertical. I like mine to be extra strong in this regard. When a camera is tilted vertically, it's actually off of the tripod's center of gravity. I never use the extended neck on these tripods for that very reason, as sometimes the vertical perspective is necessary.

"What makes photography a strange invention is that its primary raw materials are light and time."

~ John Berger

You can definitely pick up a used tripod system somewhere. There are super easy to test out and confirm it's serviceability prior to you trusting it with your camera out in the field. If you can get a good one for cheap, go for it. I like mine new and simply won't go for a used support system. That's just me. Every manufacturer will make tripods of various qualities, sizes, max weights, and different price points. Carbon fiber will usually run you double what an aluminum will cost. I like carbon fiber a lot. Find what suits you best in the budget you choose.

Art Model, Jenny Anne Rose ©2019 Terrell Neasley
Early morning eight-second exposure

The next most important item is going to be a cable release or remote shutter release system that plugs into your camera and allows you to actuate the shutter release without having to touch the camera itself and thus causing camera shake. Promaster makes several for just about every camera system and when I do my one-on-one trainings, I'll generally have my students pick up one for $20 to $30, depending on what cameras system they have.

Next all you need is a still subject and the proficiency to shoot them giving the lighting challenges and/or low light limitations of your camera. If you have any of the Sony A7S models, then you don't really have any camera low light limitations. If you're working with a camera with ISO deficiencies, then yes, you'll have to work within that. But generally speaking, you'll be on a tripod, so ISO 100 will usually suffice. I say generally, because if you're doing astro work, then max ISO is where you'll be. In either case doing a portrait in single-sourced low light can be both fun and challenging, but it's sure to pay off with some good work.

Art Model, Jenny Anne Rose ©2019 Terrell Neasley
Outdoor lamp post shining in through side window

You can easily get started by using the obvious sources of light around you. The lamp on your light stand; the light coming off the TV or computer monitor, an overhead patio light. Get creative with it. Try using the refrigerator light, a match, a headlamp, a night light. You can even play with different LED lights you might find in the toy section or automotive departments. Experiment! That's the main aim here. Experimentation and just play. Use a lowest ISO setting on your camera unless you are NOT using a tripod. In which case you want to use the lowest ISO you can get away with. Target an ISO that will allow for a shutter speed of at least 1/60th of a second, but cheat a little if you can. Go to 1/30th or even 1/15th and get some interesting blur. Have your model be as still as possible, but only move her head from one side to the other with a 2 second shutter. If you are not using a model and are doing night time/low light landscape, well, look to see if the wind is blowing the trees or tall grass and let that determine what your shutter should be. Just go out there and shoot and see what happens. Have some fun with this!

20 February 2023

Photography is Amazing!

“Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.”

― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

I've been in this game for a while now, since 2005. At any given time, its easy to get bored, burned out, or just simply tired of a profession, industry, or business of some sort. It's normal. Things stagnate from time to time. Monotony often sets in and you have to look for a little change in routine or maybe take a break to step away from your profession from time to time. In the Armed Services, we were encouraged to take some R&R to blow off steam on a regular basis. Getting burned out could cause lapses in inspections of equipment or result in attention to detail issues.

I can't say this has been the case with me in photography. I am just as excited about it now as when I saw my first print come to life as it sat in a fresh batch of Kodak D-76 developer. And that was something in and of itself that you just couldn't get tired of. It was like magic. After careful exposure, and burning and dodging in a darkroom, a blank sheet of Ilford Fiber-based Variable Contrast Multigrade IV paper, suddenly came to life with the image you previously captured on film. I'll confess, though. I had my doubts when I switched to digital in 2007. I was a film purist because I felt digital took out the craftsmanship in which I made that print with my hands, manipulating light and shadow to make the final print. Photoshop seemed too much bits and bytes, and not enough of a man-made feel. I got over that the more I realized, its not so much the hands, but more the mind that creates and manipulates the light and shadow.

I can't say its like this for every photog I meet. I have met quite a few whose camera is more of a job than a creative outlet. They work, earn money, and that's it. No personal projects, just take the money and put the camera down till its time to earn money again. I don't begrudge them. That's their choice. As for me, I think I am still in love with photo for a few reasons.

1. First and foremost, I shoot what I like. You gotta pay me a lot of money to make me shoot something I don't really want to shoot. I learned that when I first got to Vegas and got a gig shooting furniture for a business in the World Market Center here in Vegas for showroom ads. Shooting a white couch under 3 different kinds of light on the showcase floor sucked. Granted, I still didn't know near as much as I do now, but I did it for the money. HATED IT! I learned that early on and it was a blessing. Shoot what you love.

2. I have an inherent desire to be good at whatever I spend the most time in. I study my ass off in most anything I want to know about. But for something I absolutely love, my study habits kick into overdrive. Its not always in a desire to be better. Most times, its because I have something on my brain that I want to create and have to learn how to do it. So I am in a constant state of learning to improve and hone my craft. Additionally, I don't stay on the same thing for too long. One day my thing may be landscape. Another day, its portraits. And then I want to kick it up and do extended exposure. Lastly, I simply hate not knowing. The better you get, the more people you attract. I get other photographers who ask me questions about settings or maybe how to shoot something. Often times I act as a forensic scientist to detect what was wrong or troubleshoot an issue with a camera or image. "What's this thick black line that goes all the way across the bottom of my picture?" Its a result of using a shutter speed higher than the sync speed of your camera when using flash. How do I know that? I didn't want to be afraid of using artificial light, so I studied flash. So study your ass off.

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.”

― W.B. Yeats

3. I associate with a other photographers and learn from mentors. I started the very first Meetup.com photography group in Las Vegas. It was the Las Vegas Art Models Group mainly for helping photographers learn to work with the nude model as well as helping nude models get hired by photographers. I then partnered with one of the attendees of my group, Garrett Winslow, to organize another group, the Las Vegas Photographic Society made for photographers to help them network and grow their craft. Over the years, I developed a good reputation by sharing my knowledge, but also from increasing my knowledge with mentors like Dave Rudin and Dave Levingston, just to name a few. I have also stayed active in online groups to share my work, get feedback, and offer help to others. So don't become an island.

4. I started working in a camera shop. B&C Camera, owned by my good friend and accomplished photographer Joe Dumic. He bought this camera shop when every other one was failing, turned it around and this store not only survived, but thrives. Joe has helped me immensely in my own business operations. Working in a camera store gave me the ability to tap into a knowledge base you won't find anywhere else. I was there part time, but I learned about every new camera system that came out. Technology is changing all the time. So don't restrict your universe to just the gear you know. Surround yourself with and learn from other great talent.

5. I like to experiment and take chances. I know that every endeavor I take won't pan out. I'm okay with that. Sometimes I lose money. Sometimes, all my efforts are wasted; but are they really? Every time I do something that doesn't pan out, its really a learning experience. I can honestly say, I learn some valuable lessons when I get screwed over, lose an opportunity, or otherwise fail. I learn how to be wiser with my selections on who I deal with, how to prepare better, and thus better protect myself from unfortunate events. Learning these lessons early on helped keep the ripples from these mistakes small. I don't mind small mistakes. And catching them early keeps the big ones at bay. So learn to play and don't be afraid to fail.

I could list several more, but this post is getting long. To add a few more...

persistence despite rough times,
doing your own personal projects,
constantly looking at other great work,
teaching photography,
and traveling

... would all be key elements that definitely aid in my ability to stay locked in on photo. In all these years, photo has never been a dried up concept for me. And you know...another great motivator is that if you get good enough, people will pay you to keep doing what you do. So.... Amazing, isn't it?

20 December 2020

On the Passion for Travel and the Changing World

My mother recently sent me something regarding a pilgrimage letter by a woman named Egeria. It's about her insatiable desire to make a religious trek to Israel and document her experience for people she left at home. The author used her venture as the premise of his article which focused on people's need... no, passion to go out and see the world, to know unknown places, and journey beyond familiar horizons.

Of course, my mother thought of me when she came across this in some of her Bible studies. Most people associate travel with a vacation. For Egeria, this is a way of life and a means to an end. Travel, in and of itself, is not the main goal. Her desire was not the journey... at least not as I interpret it. The goal was Israel. The means was the pilgrimage. Ergo, travel is the means to accomplish her objective.

Sometimes it is solely about the destination. I've often said, the only thing that sucks about travel is the actual travel. In so many cases this is true. Unless you have posh means to do so, that will be the reality of the majority who don't. The experiences WHILE you travel are the moments that make the reality of travel worthwhile. The culmination of the destination and the experiences enroute will dictate whether you chose to endure the travel again.

This time last year, I had returned to the US after two months in Argentina and a few weeks in Peru. I can tell you that flying through four countries and having to check in AND out of immigration and customs at each country sucked! Waiting in the long cattle lines to check in for your flight or get your visa stamped blows! The constant aggravation of wondering if you'll make your next flight and knowing there is a real and valid possibility you won't can be daunting.

Or, how about taking a 14-hour shuttle that is filled beyond the seating capacity. Yes, this is the case. I've watched a woman trying to maintain some dignity while sitting in the lap of a man she had never met before. Six hours in, you would have thought they were a married couple as she slept in his arms.

No, it's not always like that. I've had some pleasant experiences as well, and its usually because I had good company that made it all bearable. Although rare, there have been some circumstances where my means of travel was notably and memorably pleasant for one reason or another. I do not count on those situations being a regular occurrence.

Nonetheless, it is the passion for travel that makes us endure any of the hardships. Otherwise, I would have come home a long time ago instead of nearing 3 years on the road. Like Egeria, I try to document my experiences and write about the people I meet, cultures I learn about, and the myriad of unique places I visit and explore. A picture may be worth a thousand words, but let me be frank with you. A thousand words will never let you understand the uncertainty of sitting on cargo on the back of a commercial fishing boat in the middle of an unexpected storm at sea because its the only thing going out to the island you need to get to. An album of photos will not help you track the line of choices that led you to say yes to a group of Nicaraguan bikers when they ask you to go on an adventure with them 10 minutes after you meet them. And nothing the world has to offer will help you understand the feeling of abject loneliness that makes you question your decision to stay in a foreign country during a global pandemic.

You must travel on your own and have your own experiences. Yours will be unique from mine. I have almost died on occasion... occasionS would be more accurate. But this is no more different than the same things that happens around you every day already. People have traffic accidents, get robbed, and for one reason or another, people die every day. The world is changing. People are working and being educated remotely. The covers are being pulled back on a different way of life. New opportunities are afforded to more people to move beyond the traditional, the ordinary, and societal norms. How will you adjust, in order to, not just compete, but thrive? Will you continue to make buggy whips and then complain about losing your job?

I made a photobook once, called "Where I Have Been". I made it exclusively for my mother, because I know she will not ever get to see the top of a mountain. Therefore, I wanted her to see from the eyes of her own blood the world from a high above overlooking the magnitude of an immense valley. She does not see well. I will not get her to climb a mountain with me. However, now she can have a perspective of the world from eyes that she gave birth to.

My point is that I know everybody can't do this. But there are many of you who have great eyes AND knees! You have your youthfulness, vigor, health, or whatever. Anthony Bourdain suggested to sleep on the floor if you have to, but find a way to travel! I'm not exceptional, but I know every one can't be like me. I made the choice to dump everything and be gone in pretty much a single day around the beginning of November of 2017. By January 7th, I was flying. That's drastic for a lot of people. I get that. That's just who I am.

And I'm not even suggesting you travel right now! Or even outside the US, for that matter. What I am saying is that with the changing world, you can begin preparations NOW! You can make changes and learn the habits that will allow for a different lifestyle. If you do have a passion for travel, I can't think of a better time in your life than right now to begin. If you want my advice, don't worry about the money. Worry about getting rid of DEBT!! If you did want to travel right this very second, then yeah... it's possible. Many countries are opening up again, even for US citizens. It's a pain... but then again, I just told you that's the nature of travel.

The world is changing. What changes are you willing to make?

20 July 2022

I Am Not Normal

“If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.”

― Maya Angelou

Earlier this year, I set out some objectives that I'll touch on right now since the year is more than half over. I'm going to try to update the blog twice a month and for the second post of each month, I think I'll do an opinion/update piece. I mentioned in March I'd address more of the questions and opinions I often receive.

For an update, I talked about doing another book, specifically a republished and more economical version of my Jenny in Peru book. That didn't happen so my next goal was to do a magazine instead as it was much more economical than the books I was doing for $350 to $450. However, as fortune would have it, my publisher stopped doing magazines! Dang it! So I'm searching more options for that to put out publications that are in the neighborhood of $30 to $50.

I will most definitely not get to do film photography nor acquire the film cameras I mentioned back in January. As much as I hate it, that's not a feasible option. I'm still in need of updating my current Sony cameras and am anxiously waiting to see what the Sony a7R V will be like. Those specs will determine if I get it or settle for the more available previous model. Either one will be a big upgrade for me.

As for questions and opinions, umm.... I'm going to hit on another familiar topic that's near and dear to me. I've posted on it before. Maybe a few times, in fact. But recently, another woman asked once again, the two most widely asked questions I get:

Why do they have to be naked?

They don't. However, I mostly shoot the ones who do get naked! But nobody HAS to be anything. Some people shoot landscape. Why do they always have to have a river running through their shot? They don't. It's just their personal preference and what they are drawn to. Same with me. I've photographed women with clothes on. Even one recently and I LOVED it more than I thought I would (above). But I've done this several times. NONETHELESS, nude art has my heart better than anything else. So I photograph what I love. Following that would be Portraiture and Landscape. I've included a couple links to previous blog posts that give a more thorough explanation.

My Top 3 Passions, Part 2: The Nude - 17 May 2020

Nude vs. Naked - 23 October 2020

Why can't they be more classic and tasteful?

This one isn't necessarily tougher, but I think it's more difficult for people to accept. But here I go...

I had a model show up to a photoshoot once and she was a bit upset. She was honest with her boyfriend about coming to shoot with me and he didn't like it. He didn't like her exposing herself to another man who took photos of her naked form. Obviously, she came anyway at the risk of the relationship. In the end of her rant she gave a most activating and galvanizing comment, referencing people like myself and her.

"We are not NORMAL people, Terrell!"

It felt like someone had hit me in the back when she said it. My eyes opened wide and in that moment, it related us to a network of other men and women who do things a little bit differently which may not be widely accepted or understood by public and "decent" society. It was a recognition and a validation. I knew how I felt, but to have someone else not only acknowledge it, but also identify with me in it... priceless.

Art Model, Alba

And therein lies my truth. I'm not a normal dude. Via a course of events in my life, I am where I am and who I am. I've had to do things differently than many people. For as long as I can remember, I've been different: the only black guy hiking/camping in the desert, or in my entire undergrad finance department, or as branch manager at a bank of 60 some-odd managers between Tennessee and Georgia. I was the youngest and lowest rank owning a home on my block when I lived in Tennessee. A neighbor confronted me to ask if I was a drug dealer because he could find no other reason why I could own my house at my rank. He was a Captain. I was an E-5 Sergeant. Turns out, my rate was two percentage points lower than his.

I had to learn to embrace it or let it overwhelm me. As a freshman in HS, I was in a class of, not my peers, but rather Juniors and Seniors... a Speech Class where I have to get up in front of everybody and entertain, inform, or debate them! Granted... it made me better and prepared me for SEVERAL life situations.

As a soldier, I understood I had to be different to do and endure some of the things my commanders directed me to do in order to complete the mission. Who in their right mind will stand out for days in 40 below weather? Who walks 10+ kilometers in pitch black darkness just to find a road intersection and monitor it until you are told to return? You haven't been in my shoes, so judging me is more of a reflection on you than it is me.

“Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.”

― Sigmund Freud

I shoot a wide range of nude art, but I'm not as interested in shooting for the purpose of creating classic nude art. "Tasteful" is not my aim because I am not certain what that means. Tasteful? Whose interpretation of it? I shoot the nude. All of the nude. I was taught this from my models and I feel like it set me free, giving me liberties to better articulate the art that is in me to create from perspectives I might not have otherwise explored. I'm not trying to be graphic. I just shoot what fits and will do a wide range of poses influenced by the environment, the model's features/demeanor/style, or simply for my mood and vision. For me, that's called freedom.

Art Model, Panda

And quite frankly, I don't get it. If you appreciate the nude, but can't stand the sight of a vulva, what the hell! And if art is supposed to be a reflection of life and an artist's expression/interpretation of reality... is not sex a part of life? Try having life without sex and see how far it gets you. Look, I'm not totally ignorant. I know many are afraid of porn, which has a totally different connotation, and finding the distinction between art and porn is a blurred line. And rightly so. In fact... wait for next month's blog post!

Admittedly, while my art may at times be deemed explicit or gratuitous, I don't really depict sex in it hardly ever. I don't usually have models touching themselves, nor revealing themselves unmerited. There is usually purpose behind it when I do. I'm sure you noticed the operative word... USUALLY! Oftentimes, I will let a model do as she chooses and I run with it. I get my shots, but maybe I don't post everything. I might save it for later, or for a more appropriate venue. Perhaps even never allow it in public period. Just keep it between me and my model. I never know.

But the main thing is there are many conservative nude photographers out there. Several of them are friends of mine and I enjoy their work, immensely. And then I go do my own! I don't hate on nobody else. I respect their craft and I do mine. Except for Implied Nude photogs. I can put those guys in a barrel and roll them down a hill. (I used to do my brother like that. Brings back memories.) But no, I'm not fond of implied nudes.

So that's where I am in my life. That's what I do. I was all about conservative nudes when I started back in 2005. And then I had some models who set me straight. And I appreciate that so much. Because they have a story to tell, too. If my work is not for you, don't be offended and don't ask me to apologize. Instead, don't choose to look at it. Don't shoot with me. Same as if you hate spicy food. Don't eat it and don't degrade someone who loves a little heat on their tongues. If you want, come talk to me about it. I'd invite that. Otherwise, I'm cool and I hope you can still respect me, because I want to respect you.

"Photography to the amateur is recreation, to the professional it is work, and hard work too, no matter how pleasurable it my be."

- Edward Weston

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