|"Sometimes I Do Wear Clothes", |
|"How Could You Know"|
|"But I Wasn't Concentrating"|
I previously had a different site here on dA, that would have been 2 years ago (so 2008-2009). I acquired a decent fan base, though nothing in comparison to what I have now. After a period of time, I closed the account, just lost interest in continuing the site, maybe even became slightly self-conscience to have such a practice. I began again afresh a little more than a year ago on the site I currently have. I began partly for something to do, and partly because I wanted to create beautiful images with my body; Or if not beautiful, provocative.
How did I get started? Well, it’s not an exciting story. I decided to start one day and I did. I don’t remember it real vividly. I have limited technical abilities (especially when I first started with my little point and shoot), so I would try to time it right to have good natural lighting that I could "bathe" in. I have much more success with getting good images when I start with good lighting.
On my previous dA site, my favorite image was one where I had a backlight behind me and was hold a beautiful veil like material in front of me. People noted how dreamlike it was. So when I began again, I felt that should be my starting point--this very vague, cryptic, dreamlike feeling where you're getting bits and pieces of a larger, though somewhat strange story. Because I feel this is a very strange story--to see or be told only the most vulnerable, intimate part of this exposed woman. "Strange dreams" doesn't have any ring to it. So I brainstormed other words I knew to be "dreamlike." Oneiric came to mind (good old vocab words from who knows when coming to the surface). And there the alias was born.
I personally am very comfortable with my body (usually) but I understand this is not true for everyone. As a result, I don't go walking around my house in my underwear and certainly not in public. Also, taking pictures and posting them on a site where you know no one and vice versa, very different than if I hung these up in my living room. As it is, I don't feel very brave to be posting under this alias.
|"Tired of the Routine"|
I have to admit I didn't begin with an inspiration and still don't have one. I just post what I feel.
5) You previously wrote a post stating your goal is to allow images to be your expression where words were insufficient. I really like that, btw. What exactly is it that you are trying to articulate with your photos?
Well the photos are a visual journal to me, at least some of them. I can remember very clearly how I was feeling when I took, "Beautiful, I guess" for example, though I don't remember why I felt that way. But it speaks to me to be able to look back and see that raw emotion, feel it again in a sense. What am I trying to articulate? Well I never know in the moment. I just take images that usually express what I'm feeling that moment, though sometimes the images are just something I've had in my head for a while and then truly pose for. So hopefully each image articulates something a little different.
|"A Scene Begins"|
No, I don't think I'll be photographing nudes other than myself. I tried this once with some friends. We all got all giddy being naked with one another. Got a couple great shots of two friends laughing hysterically together, but we never repeated the shoot. And now I've lost touch with them. It's strangely hard to find people willing to do this. And I don't ask around much. This is my thing. Self-portraits in general are appealing to me for a few reasons. One, I don't have to work around other people's schedules when I want to shoot. Two, to toot my own horn, I know I'm decently photogenic. Few of my friends are. Three, it's a bit therapeutic.
I like to do them in the nude for a few simple reasons: I don't have to worry about color schemes in clothes. One less thing to think about. Also, it's instantly more raw and intimate to do a photo nude. More humane. More timeless. We will always have our bodies. Finally, for my own amusement of seeing my undulating weight patterns and how my body proportions change as a result. (also, it’s interesting to see when others notice this, though few have noted it)
Art is a lie which makes us realize the truth. This parallels to my images in that, well they are not real life. Or they do not show a full "picture," the full story. They freeze a moment, and in my case a staged moment or one that was manipulated and forced to the surface, and there it stays. And then we draw from these moments and realize something… Perhaps the truth.
8) You don’t have to reveal your true age, but I’m guessing you’re not older than 22…23 max. How does a young woman learn to close a chapter in her life, as you mentioned in your journal, so early? Has modeling taught you any life lessons?
|"How You Laughed"|
9) How have you changed since you first began photographing yourself?
I suppose I've become more aware of my sexuality and femininity. Other changes I would attribute to general life growth/progression, though, not because of modeling.
10) You have a fairly decent fan-base. How do you think they have grown so quickly? Why do you feel they come back? Do you feel any sense of responsibility to them now?
Do I really responsibility to my "fans" now? Well, I suppose this is the wrong thing to say, but no, not really. There are so many artists here on dA, if I stopped posting people would be sad for all of like one day and then we'd all move on and then we'd all move on with our lives.
11) What would you say are your most challenging issues or concerns as a photog/model?
Being that this isn't a career for me or even a serious pursuit, I can't say it's really that challenging or concerning of a hobby typically. I do it for my own amusement and enjoyment; when it loses that air, then I'll stop. Security issues are definitely in the back of my mind just because that is so out of my control and I probably won't ever know if my work is/has been misused or sold for pornographic purposes and such.
12) You range from images that are relatively benign in nature to some that are more explicit. How do you decide how racy your images will be when you decide to shoot? Is it a mood? Do you alternate benign one week and explicit the next? What boundaries do you set for yourself?
13) Would it bother you if someone suggested your work was pornographic rather than art erotica?
It would probably bother me a little if someone suggested my work belonged on a pornographic site. I would probably go through my gallery and analyze for myself if I thought I had overstepped appropriate lines. But I try to be mindful of this before posting, typically. So on this site, I would probably just say, "uh huh" and not reply further.
|"Your Skin and Bones"|
So what next? A valid question. I just don't know. As for modeling, at some point later in life (when I have more money to go taking trips and flying throughout the country), I do think it would be fun to do a photo shoot with an accomplished photographer. And then like 40 years from now do another nude shoot with a photographer. That would be a truly interesting show, I think--to have prints up in a very similar style of myself at different stages/ages in life. As for life itself? Graduate with flying colors. Get my dream job. Be awesome.
15) What advice would you give to another young lady wishing to do what you are doing?
I don't think that I would advise other young women to do this. It's not exactly a safe thing to do and you have to kind of ignore a lot of crude comments from men. If her mind was set to do it, though, I would advise to just do it for yourself. Post what you feel and make it meaningful.
16) If you were interviewing yourself, what good question might you ask that I’ve missed? And what would be your answer?
Other questions I would ask myself if we switched roles...well...I'm not sure really. You didn't leave any holes, from what I can see. I'll let you know if I think of anything else, though.
|"Thinking About Tomorrow"|